Allo! Did you just say hello?

the_worm

Who am I and what makes me qualified to write a blog. Well, that is what I am trying to figure out. My name is Katie; it used to be Katie Johnson, but I got married to Phillip. We had a son together named Liam. Liam is awesome, and a pain, and loving, and hyper, and excitable, and imaginative, and creative,  and… and… and… I could go on forever. He also happens to be autistic, something my family and I are still trying to wrap our heads around.

I am super close to my mom. She saw my vagina; not on a regular basis, but rather when I was giving birth to my awesome superhero son Liam. In fact a lot of people saw my vagina that day. My mom and I have a silent understanding on many, many subjects. We finish each other’s sentence like twins and we get into trouble like Lucy and Ethel. I’m Lucy, by the way. I have red hair.

Am I a blogress? We’ll find out. THE Blogress is Jenny Lawson and the reason I decided to try this blogging thing. If you don’t know who that is, click here http://thebloggess.com/ she’s funny and real and inspirational as crap.

I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Theatre. It’s about useless. Why? Because like a good portion of people who have fine arts degrees, I don’t use it. I have  a Master’s  degree in the Art of Teaching. Also proving to be useless. Why? Because I suck at interviewing, I have social anxiety. I forget everything I’ve ever learned about teaching thirty minutes before an interview and the amnesia lasts 24 to 48 hours after it’s completed. It’s like the side effects the voice over actor is contractually obligated to list off in a medicine commercial. Side effects may include: temporary amnesia, a tingling sensation in hands, feet, and stomach, if more serious side effects occur such as firmly wedging foot in mouth please consult the internet, because the internet is true, amiright? I’ve literally had an interview with every school in the tristate area that is within a 30-50 mile radius. I have to stay local because I get a call from my son’s preschool about every other day to pick him up for whatever reason.